Tuesday, December 21, 2010

eBay is so not my forte'!

Over the past few weeks, I've been listing (and even selling some) items on eBay:  Heely shoes in both girl and boy varieties that were "too big" when they were received as gifts, then too small when we decided to let the kidlets have them, an unused brand new, (they sold but weren't paid for does any one want me to overnight them to you for under your tree?), a new, unused toddler bed (that SweeTart refuses to sleep in!), a Pottery Barn Speed Boat Bed that DinoBoy outgrew (sold it right from under him) and most significantly:  the Dune Buggy! 

I've had people not pay for items, not realize that "pick up only in NJ" means that I will not ship it to Michigan, and most significantly:  a dude sent me money through PayPal for the Dune Buggy then hopped in his truck, not really knowing where he was going, to pick this Buggy up... from Wisconsin.  HELLO?  I don't care how good a deal it was or how nice the dune buggy really is ... driving from Wisconsin, blindly, then calling us from Harrisburg wanting to know if he can pick it up that night?  Um, no. 

The dude used "buy it now" to purchase the dune buggy, paypaled the $ over then I heard the distinct sound of crickets chirping when I emailed him after receiving the payment - it kind of went like this:  "dude, i received your payment for the dune buggy.  i need to make sure that you know this is a pick up only item in new jersey.  it appears you're located in Wisconsin - so i just wanted to touch base with you.  please let me know how you wish to proceed.  signed: i have your cash"  I sent this email to the Paypal email address I had for him at 6:36 a.m.  A little early in Wisconsin, I know.  At lunchtime, I still heard nothing until I get a message from my mom that dude called my house to find out my address and to see if he could pick it up before Christmas or after.  He left his number and asked that I call him back.  No problem.  I called back about an hour after he called my house. Left a nice message.  Again.  Crickets.  Four hours go by, I call the number again ... left another message "dude, just wanted to make sure you got my previous message."  Crickets.  I left work, went home, called from there - answering machine.  Again.  I didn't leave a message.  Took Twink to an eye doctor appointment.  Called dude from cell phone in the waiting room, left another message.  Hit "refresh" on my phone.  Received an email, through eBay from the dude.  Wanting to know where his item is.  For real?  It's in freaking NJ dude.  That's where it is.  

I called him immediately.  Guess what?  CRICKETS.  Answering Machine.  Left another message that went like this "are you checking your messages?  i received your email through eBay wanting to know where the item is and it is in NJ.  please call me to discuss."  I no sooner hung up that my phone refreshed, leaving me another message from this dude, again, via eBay.  This one said:  "call me at xxxxxxxxx if you do not, i will report you to eBay."  WTF?  Sorry, my hubs is trying to get me to limit my cursing but in this instance, it just slips out!!  I immediately do two things:  I respond to his email through eBay and I call said number (which is the same number I've been calling all day!!)   Guess what the response that I get is?  Yup, CRICKETS.  The dude does not answer the phone nor does he respond to my email.

We leave the doctor's office, and take DinoBoy to meet Hubs at wrestling practice.  I am fuming.  We are trying to look at the pretty Christmas lights on the way to the school.  SweeTart falls asleep and misses all of the light action.  Twink tries to keep things light when she knows I am steaming because of this "dude."  When we arrive at the school for practice, Hubs is not yet there.  I try to call the dude again.  No answer.  Left another message.  Who is this joker threatening to report me to eBay yet he doesn't respond to one email or phone message that I've left??!!!  When Hubs arrives, I tell him the saga.  He tries calling the dude and leaves a rather unpleasant message telling him that we're going to send back the money that he sent us and cancel this transaction because this is getting a bit CRAZY.  After Hubs and DinoBoy go to practice, the girls and I went home to ... call eBay to figure out how we can get rid of this psycho.  eBay can't do anything .. yet.  After 45 minutes and 2 supervisors, the best I can get out of them was to contact the dude one more time, through eBay's email and give him an entire 24 hours to respond.  If he doesn't respond or responds unfavorably, send a request. 

Move on to the next day (yesterday.)  I still hadn't heard from the dude by lunchtime.  I didn't push the matter as I really just wanted to cancel the transaction, refund his money and move on.  But, the stars were not aligned exactly as I had hoped.  In the afternoon, he again called the house - told my Mom that his phone had died yesterday (no apologies or anything) and indicated he was in Harrisburg, PA and wanted to know if he could pick the dune buggy up that evening.  What?  He went from "contact me or else" to "i'm driving halfway across the country and want to come to visit you?"  Hubs called him back this time and told him that he could pick up the dune buggy from his shop instead of at our house.  Who knows what kind of weirdo this guy is, right?  Why give him access to us at home.  He tells him the address and tells him he can pick it up at 9:00 a.m.  The guy calls back and wants to pick it up earlier - so he tells him it can be picked up at 7 a.m.: take it or leave it.  This is all before 5:00 when Twink needs to be at practice.

Fastfoward to 7:45 p.m. - the phone rings and it is the dude!!!!  WTF - oh no - I cursed again.  When I answered the phone he tells me that he is a little lost but close by.  He proceeds to tell me that he is in a strip mall with a pizza place and is going to spend the night there.  WTF?  (that makes three for this post!)  About 8 miles down the road is a rinky dink motel that the dude can stay at.  What is the name of the pizza joint again?  I have never  heard of it.  I pass the phone to Hubs who wants no part of it!  Ha!  He has no idea where the pizza joint is either and we try to look it up on the internet.  Can't find it anywhere close by (or far away for that matter either!)  Hubs gives him the address of his shop again and determines that he has gone too far south and is probably by Rowan University .. and tells him he'll see him in the morning.

Bright and early this morning, the dude shows up at Hubs' shop.  without a trailer.  He assumed he would be able to throw the dune buggy in the back of his truck and continue on his merry way back to Wisconsin.  Unfortunately, the dune buggy is at least as wide of his truck and much longer than the length of the bed as well.  Now he has to figure out how to rent a trailer.  Luckily for him, there is a Uhaul that has trailer rentals down the street from the shop.  They have to wait 2 hours for the store to open!  He must have gone to the local diner or something - I can't imagine Hubs trying to run his business get his guys out and babysit this dude too!

My story ends with the dude renting a box trailer, having to take the wheels and rear fenders off of the buggy to get it into the trailer.  He didn't want to take the front fenders off - so one of those cracked shoving it into the trailer - (you already bought it buddy!)  And, he's very happy with the deal he got and is well on his way back to Wisconsin as we speak. 

The moral of the story?  If you sell on eBay, do not have your home phone number in your account information .. use your cell phone number.  Once you have a transaction started with someone they can request your information and eBay will automatically send them your name, email address and phone number.  If you have your home phone number on file, the weirdos in the world can do a reverse look up and find you online - they might be able to find you anyway but this just facilitates the process.  Also, if you are expecting to be paid, only sell to users that have a Paypal account and that have had positive feedback.  In my case, dude had a Paypal account but just joined eBay on Sunday!  Zero feedback! 

I have definitely made the suggested changes to my account.  I so do not need any extra drama in my life these days!  But it does make a good story!!  :-)


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Baby G said...

That is so f'n hysterical. (Oops I cursed too). So sorry for laughing at your expense. When you look back, won't you laugh too???